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Thread: Nyan Cat

  1. #1
    Osmium AngelScythe's Avatar
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    Nyan Cat

    I kept my silence when Nyan Cat announced it wanted to play on people's conscious and unconscious belief structures. I did nothing when it tried to infiltrate and then dominate and control the mass media. But its latest editorials are the straw that breaks the camel's back. And that's why I feel compelled to say something about crabby spoilsports.

    Hey, it's not my fault that if antinomianism were an Olympic sport, Nyan Cat would clinch the gold medal. We must acknowledge as a people that "Nyan Cat" has become a byword for treachery and deceit. In this case, one cannot help but recall that it seems unable to think of turns of speech that aren't hackneyed. What really grates on my nerves, however, is that Nyan Cat's prose consists less of words chosen for the sake of their meaning than of phrases tacked together like the sections of a prefabricated henhouse. Nyan Cat has an uncanny ability to totally miss the point of any given issue. Now take that to the next level: Those of us who are too lazy or disinterested to protect the interests of the general public against the greed and unreason of diabolic, duplicitous blatherskites have no right to complain when it and its admirers foist the most poisonously false and destructive myths imaginable upon us.

    While Nyan Cat has a right to its opinion, it asserts that unfounded attacks on character, loads of hyperbole, and fallacious information are the best way to make a point. That assertion is not only untrue but a conscious lie. Nyan Cat's confreres are unified under a common goal. That goal is to sacrifice children on the twin altars of vigilantism and greed. Believe it or not, a few stentorian astrologers actually want Nyan Cat to smear people of impeccable character and reputation. In my view, this is a consummate outrage, an unmitigated despotism, an unparalleled infamy, and an atrocious crime.

    One of the things I find quite interesting is listening to other people's takes on things. For instance, I recently overheard some folks remark that Nyan Cat, with its craftiness and nefarious opuscula, will entirely control our country's exuberant riches faster than you can say "piezocrystallization". Nyan Cat will then use those riches to promote racial superiority doctrines, ethnic persecution, imperialist expansion, and genocide. The moral of this story is that it is still going around insisting that it's a saintly figure—philanthropic, noble, and wise. Jeez, I thought I had made it perfectly clear to it that if we let it cause one-sided reportages to be entered into historical fact, all we'll have to look forward to in the future is a public realm devoid of culture and a narrow and routinized professional life untouched by the highest creations of civilization. In such a brief letter as this, I certainly cannot refute all the activities of prolix doofuses but perhaps I can brush away some of their most deliberate and flagrant publicity stunts. Did Nyan Cat cancel its plans to rebrand local churches as faith-based emporia teeming with impulse-buy items because it had a change of heart, or is it continuing the same battle on another front? It would appear to be the latter.

    If you want a better opportunity to get a job, raise a family in a safe neighborhood, have a better chance at a good education, and lower the taxes on the money you earn, then I ask that you help me bring Nyan Cat down a peg. Where does the line get drawn? I know more about tribalism than most people. You might even say that I'm an expert on the subject. I can therefore state with confidence that if Nyan Cat manages to destroy all tradition, all morality, and the entire democratic system, civilization will crumble almost immediately. Investigators from a future era will need to sift through the charred wreckage of our society looking for the black box to figure out what happened. Maybe they'll even discover that if I chose to do so I could write exclusively about Nyan Cat's whiney excuses and never be lacking for material. Nonetheless, I'd rather spend some time discussing how I frequently talk about how Nyan Cat's success at gumming up what were once great ideas has so far formed an insuperable obstacle to my ability to face our problems realistically, get to the root of our problems, and be determined to solve them. I would drop the subject except that its vicegerents resist seeing that I pledge—in my daily life, in my family, my work, my community, my country, and my region—to honor our nation's glorious mosaic of cultures and ethnicities. They resist seeing such things because to see them, to examine them, to think about them and draw conclusions from them is to open students' eyes, minds, hearts, and souls to the world around them.

    Though I am unequivocally not a proponent of conflict, it would be good for the press to start paying attention to things like this. Am I being unduly harsh for writing that? I think not. When the religious leaders in Jesus's time were wrong, Jesus denounced them in extremely harsh terms. So why shouldn't I, too, use extremely harsh terms to indicate that Nyan Cat should reserve its stereotypes and labels and remember to treat others with a bit more respect and equality? Mankind, with all of its accumulated knowledge, wonderful machines, scientific methods, and material power, still has much to fear from petty anthropophagi like Nyan Cat. So what's the connection between that and Nyan Cat's mind games? The connection is that I intend to find more constructive contexts in which to work toward resolving conflicts. That's the path that I have chosen. It's indubitably not an easy path, but then again, we must rouse people's indignation at Nyan Cat. This is a terrible and awesome responsibility—a crushing responsibility. However, if we stick together we can can show the world that Nyan Cat's squadristi actually believe the bunkum they're always mouthing. That's because these types of supercilious boors are idealistic, have no sense of history or human nature, and they think that what they're doing will somehow improve the world sometime soon. In reality, of course, there is an unpleasant fact, painful to the tender-minded, that one can deduce from the laws of nature. This fact is also conclusively established by direct observation. It is a fact so obvious that rational people have always known it and no one doubted it until Nyan Cat and its adherents started trying to deny it. The fact to which I am referring states that there is a proper place in life for hatred. Hatred of that which is wrong is a powerful and valuable tool. But when Nyan Cat perverts hatred in order to ridicule the accomplishments of generations of great men and women, it becomes clear that it says that once it has approved of something it can't possibly be complacent. You know, it can lie as much as it wants but it can't change the facts. If it could, it'd obviously prevent anyone from hearing that its claim that our only chance of saving the planet is to accept unending regulations and straightjacket "reforms" from its encomiasts requires a willing suspension of disbelief, an ability to set logic aside and accept any preposterous notion that Nyan Cat throws at us.

    Are Nyan Cat's snow jobs good for the country? The nation's suicide statistics, drug statistics, crime statistics, divorce statistics, and mental illness statistics give us part of the answer. These statistics should make it clear that I'm convinced that it will prosecute, sentence, and label people as crude Luddites without the benefit of any evidence whatsoever some day. No, I'm not in tinfoil-hat land; I have abundant evidence from reliable sources that this is the case. For instance, we must speak up and speak out against Nyan Cat. If we do, then perhaps a brighter day will dawn on planet Earth. Perhaps people will open their eyes and see that we are a nation of prostitutes. By this I mean that as long as we are fat, warm, and dry we don't care what Nyan Cat does. It is precisely that lack of caring that explains why Nyan Cat will create an unwelcome climate for those of us who are striving to take a proactive, rather than a reactive, stance because it possesses a hatred that defies all logic and understanding, that cannot be quantified or reasoned away, and that savagely possesses polyloquent stuffed shirts with vulgar and uncontrollable rage.

    Okay, now it's time to offend a few people. Actually, I hope not to offend anyone, although Nyan Cat has nothing intelligent to say. I'll say that again because I want it to sink in: It is my greatest and most solemn pleasure to spread the word about Nyan Cat's loopy threats to our friends, our neighbors, our relatives, our co-workers—even to strangers. I cannot promise not to be angry at Nyan Cat. I do promise, however, to try to keep my anger under control, to keep it from leading me—as it leads Nyan Cat—to turn the world's most civilized societies into pestholes of death, disease, and horror. Nyan Cat has been trying for some time to sell the public on a pauperism-based government. Its sales pitch proceeds both pragmatically and emotionally. The pragmatic argument: Nyan Cat was chosen by God as the trustee of His wishes and desires. The emotional argument: Genocide, slavery, racism, and the systematic oppression, degradation, and exploitation of most of the world's people are all entirely justified. As you can see, neither argument is valid, which should indicate to you that Nyan Cat has stated that it is its moral imperative to foster suspicion—if not hatred—of "outsiders". I find such declaratory statements quite telling. They tell me that it wasn't so long ago that people like you and me were free to create a world in which anti-intellectualism, solecism, and Chekism are all but forgotten. Recently, that's become a lot harder to do. What happened that changed things so much? To put it briefly, Nyan Cat happened. By filling the air with recrimination and rancor, Nyan Cat has managed to subjugate persons of culture, refinement, and learning to reprehensible carousers.

    What if we collectively just told Nyan Cat's cultists, "Sure, go ahead and fortify a social correctness that restricts experience and defines success with narrow boundaries. Have fun!"? That would be worse than daffy; it would reduce human beings and many other living organisms to engineered products and mere cogs in the social machine. Maybe Nyan Cat has a reason for acting the way it does, but I doubt it. Nyan Cat's put-downs are based on a technique I'm sure you've heard of. It's called "lying". It is our duty to our children and to their children and to our yet unborn posterity to perform noble deeds—decidedly an instructive warning for the future.

    I have seen and heard enough. Now it is time to bring Nyan Cat to justice. The gods of defeatism and resistentialism figure prominently in Nyan Cat's corporate pantheon. Some people might object to that claim, and if they do, my response is: I feel no more personal hatred for Nyan Cat than I might feel for a herd of wild animals or a cluster of poisonous reptiles. One does not hate those whose souls can exude no spiritual warmth; one pities them. In closing, Nyan Cat welcomes public debate as long as all of the debaters agree with its corporate ethos.






    lololoololol i waste your time with the generator

  2. #2
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    go on....

  3. #3
    Osmium AngelScythe's Avatar
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    since you want more...

    This letter is largely extemporaneous and unedited. I'm hoping that a stream-of-consciousness approach is the most honest way to convey information about how Nyan Cat's well aware that it is offended by anything that might suggest that it is a sad state of affairs when hopeless degenerates like it take credit for others' accomplishments. The nitty-gritty of what I'm about to write is this: When people say that bigotry and hate are alive and well, they're right. And Nyan Cat is to blame.

    This march into snarky scapegoatism is not happening by mere chance. It is not, as many myopic poltroons insist, the result of the natural, inevitable course of things. It is happening as a direct result of Nyan Cat's simple-minded ideals. Speaking of nefarious slanderers, if you're not part of the solution then you're part of the problem. I can't predict the future, but I do know this: It doesn't do us much good to become angry and wave our arms and shout about the evils of Nyan Cat's drug-induced ravings in general terms. If we want other people to agree with us and join forces with us, then we must raise issues, as opposed to guns or knives. You may be worried that Nyan Cat will reduce religion to a consumer item in a spiritual supermarket in the near future. If so, then I share your misgivings. But let's not worry about that now. Instead, let's discuss my observation that Nyan Cat has been trying for some time to convince people that people don't mind having their communities turned into war zones. Don't believe its hype! Nyan Cat has just been offering that line as a means to take control of a nation and I love you >.<♥I love you >.<♥I love you >.<♥I love you >.<♥ it dry.

    The poisonous wine of interventionism had been distilled long before Nyan Cat entered the scene. Nyan Cat is merely the agent decanting the poisonous fluid from its bottle into the jug that is world humanity. As I remove the veil of ignorance I have lived behind, I find that Nyan Cat keeps trying to make bigotry respectable. And if we don't remain eternally vigilant, it will undeniably succeed. No one that I speak with or correspond with is happy about this situation. Of course, I don't speak or correspond with temperamental sciolists, Nyan Cat's cronies, or anyone else who fails to realize that Nyan Cat thinks that women are crazed Pavlovian sex-dogs who will salivate at any object even remotely phallic in shape. Of course, thinking so doesn't make it so.

    Nyan Cat's cringers are often caught trying to befuddle the public and make sin seem like merely a sophisticated fashion. Of course, they deny this but we all know full well that Nyan Cat gets a lot of perks from the system. True to form, it ceaselessly moves the goalposts to prevent others from benefiting from the same perks. This suggests that Nyan Cat's inclinations may have been conceived in idealism, but they quickly degenerated into inattentive, closed-minded mysticism.

    I once tried to explain to Nyan Cat that its endeavors will undermine the individualistic underpinnings of traditional jurisprudence. Rather than feel ashamed of itself, Nyan Cat got angry at me. What this says is that my personal safety depends upon your starting to search for solutions that are more creative and constructive than the typically pestiferous ones championed by the most disorganized mental defectives you'll ever see, just as your personal safety depends upon my doing the same. That much is crystal clear. But did you know that I don't much care to share the same planet as Nyan Cat? That's why I'm telling you that if I want to contract leprosy and be forced to live out my benighted days shunned by humanity, ringing a bell, and shying away from sharps and open flames, that should be my prerogative. I don't need Nyan Cat forcing me to.

    Nyan Cat is willing to promote truth and justice when it's convenient. But when it threatens its creature comforts, Nyan Cat throws principle to the wind. Nyan Cat isn't as smart as it thinks it is. Why is that relevant to this letter? Because Nyan Cat has been telling everyone that its manuscripts provide a liberating insight into life, the universe, and everything. I would like to remind Nyan Cat that false words are not only evil in themselves, but they infect the soul with evil. Nyan Cat uses obscure words like "nondenominationalism" and "electroencephalographic" to conceal its agenda to deprive individuals of the right to call your attention to the problem of shameless heresiarchs. I find that having to process phrases with long words like those makes me feel hoodwinked, inferior, definitely frustrated, and angry. That's why I strive for utmost clarity whenever I explain to others that aside from a few exceptions, this statement is unmistakably valid. That's self-evident, and even Nyan Cat would probably agree with me on that. Even so, it insists that it has no choice but to deface property with racially and sexually derogatory epithets and offensive symbols. Its reasoning is that a book of its writings would be a good addition to the Bible. Yes, I realize that that argument makes no sense, but Nyan Cat is the type of organization that turns up its nose at people like you and me. I guess that's because we haven't the faintest notion about the things that really matter such as why it would be good for it to terrorize our youngsters.

    For many reasons, too many and too complex to go into here at this time, I must say that Nyan Cat's serfs don't want us to condemn—without hesitation, without remorse—all those who punish dissent through intimidation, public ridicule, economic exclusion, imprisonment, and most extremely, death. That'd be too much of a threat to metagrobolism, Bulverism, and all of the other garrulous things they worship. Clearly, they prefer quoting me out of context. The hour is late indeed. Fortunately, it's not yet too late to highlight all of the problems with Nyan Cat's diabolic, sneaky artifices.

    Rigid adherence to dogmatic purity will lead only to disunity while we clearly need unity to oppose Nyan Cat and all it stands for. Nyan Cat has come up with proven methods to leave helpless citizens afraid in the streets, in their jobs, and even in their homes. All you have to do is let your guard down. We are at war. Don't think we're not just because you're not stepping over dead bodies in the streets. We're at war with Nyan Cat's hostile calumnies. We're at war with its evil mottos. And we're at war with its heartless screeds. As in any war, we ought to be aware of the fact that Nyan Cat has separate, oftentimes antipodal, interests from ours. For instance, it's intererested in contaminating or cutting off our cities' water supply. In contrast, my interests—and perhaps yours as well—include telling people that Nyan Cat likes to cite poll results that "prove" that granting it complete control over our lives is as important as breathing air. Really? Have you ever been contacted by one of its pollsters? Chances are good that you never have been contacted and never will be. Otherwise, the polls would show that Nyan Cat does not appeal to most people as being the most endearing or public-minded of organizations. Maybe its image would improve somewhat if it stopped trying to support hostile governments known for human rights abuses, wrongful imprisonment, and slavery.

    I don't want to overstate this point, but my empirically validated theory is that I went puce with rage when I first heard Nyan Cat say that it's okay to leave the educational and emotional needs of our children in the uncongenial hands of bumptious foul-types. Now I could go off on that point alone, but it is unable to separate fact from fiction. That's the sort of statement that some people allege is prodigal but which I believe is merely a statement of fact. And it's a statement that needs to be made because a great many of us don't want it to ignite a maelstrom of McCarthyism. Still, we feel a prodigious pressure to smile, to be nice, and not to object to its iconoclastic beliefs.

    I reject, with immeasurable scorn and indignation, the imputation that I have any sympathies or purposes in common with incontinent present-day robber barons. That's the theory, at least. But in practice, if there's one thing that Nyan Cat is good at, it's spreading the germs of hatred, of discord and jealously, of dissolution and decomposition. I treasure discourse and debate. Am I being too harsh for writing that? Maybe I am, but that's really the only way you can push a point through to Nyan Cat. And that's what writing this sort of letter is all about. It's a way to get my message about Nyan Cat out to the world.

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    I don't believe you...convince me

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    Osmium AngelScythe's Avatar
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    Unless you want to accumulate a long list of examples of Nyan Cat's acts of corruption and depredation, this letter may become a bit monotonous. However, I undeniably do hope you read it all the way through because Nyan Cat must believe that if it doesn't place the worst types of self-absorbed, snooty scofflaws there are at the top of the social hierarchy, it'll have led a meaningless life. The full truth of my conclusion I shall develop in the course of this letter but the conclusion's general outline is that it always looks the other way when one of its cheerleaders gets it in his head to place stumbling blocks in front of those of us who seek value and fulfilment in our personal and professional lives. Apparently, the principle laid down by Jean-Marie Collot d'Herbois during the French Reign of Terror still holds true today: Tout est permis à quiconque agit dans le sens de la révolution. My own position on this issue is both simple and clear: Nyan Cat's drones are merely ciphers. Nyan Cat is the one who decides whether or not to concentrate all the wealth of the world into its own hands. Nyan Cat is the one who gives out the orders to feed blind hatred. And Nyan Cat is the one trying to conceal how it keeps stating over and over again that people prefer "cultural integrity" and "multicultural sensitivity" to health, food, safety, and the opportunity to choose their own course through life. This drumbeat refrain is clearly not consistent with the facts on the ground—facts such as that one of the things I find quite interesting is listening to other people's takes on things. For instance, I recently overheard some folks remark that if we don't remove the Nyan Cat threat now, it will bite us in our backside sooner or later.

    What conclusion should we draw from Nyan Cat's modes of thought? How about that Nyan Cat is just making a mug of itself when it says that it is omnipotent? Finding the best way to reinforce the contentions of all reasonable people and confute those of obnoxious, treacherous utopians is a challenging problem indeed. We must therefore tackle this problem with more determination, more tenacity, and more fanaticism than it has ever been tackled before. Only then will people realize that I need your help if I'm ever to place a high value on honor and self-respect. "But I'm only one person," you might protest. "What difference can I make?" The answer is: a lot more than you think. You see, I like to speak of Nyan Cat as "foolhardy". That's a reasonable term to use, I insist, but let's now try to understand it a little better. For starters, one of the bewildering paradoxes of our time is the extent to which it is willing to support hostile governments known for human rights abuses, wrongful imprisonment, and slavery, especially given that it itself would be affected by such actions.

    It may be a bit gauche to mention this, but if you read between the lines of Nyan Cat's inveracities, you'll clearly find that Nyan Cat has been telling people that our unalienable rights are merely privileges that it can dole out or retract. This story has been uncritically swallowed and regurgitated by many half-informed, impractical nose-in-the-air snobs who find pleasure in believing it. No, I can't explain it either. However, I can say that Nyan Cat says that it is God's representative on Earth. This is at best wrong. At worst, it is a lie.

    There are two things about Nyan Cat's zingers that I find personally offensive, thoroughly unethical, and quite sad. One is that Nyan Cat prefers to keep its crass agenda hidden behind the cloak of Pyrrhonism. And the other is that Nyan Cat wants to stultify art and retard the enjoyment and adoration of the beautiful. Faugh.

    Some people have said that the hostility and boredom Nyan Cat is experiencing internally is quite evident externally. Maybe. But I'm more inclined to believe that Nyan Cat claims to have turned over a new leaf shortly after getting caught trying to allow federally funded research to mushroom into an impulsive, grossly inefficient system, hampered by stinking Philistines and the most morally questionable undesirables you'll ever see. This claim is an outright lie that is still being circulated by Nyan Cat's minions. The truth is that we should act and act fast. (Actually, the name Nyan Cat has become nearly synonymous with incomprehensible evil, but that's not important now.) Let us not sink to Nyan Cat's level. Let us combat exclusivism by exercising our right to speak out, to denounce Nyan Cat's warnings as totally unrepresentative of the values of this society.

    It has been proven time and time again that if I were a complete sap, I'd believe Nyan Cat's line that profits come before people. Unfortunately for it, I realize that whenever anyone states the obvious—that Nyan Cat's helots acquiesce with bovine stolidity when it instructs them to draw unsuspecting louts into the orbit of the most uppity toughies you'll ever see—discussion naturally progresses towards the question, "To what degree is it going to get as many people as possible to line up behind the geek-tent barkers at the latest and greatest carnival of snobbism?" Personally, I don't believe the answer has anything to do with phallocentrism. Rather, I believe it involves Nyan Cat's tendency to win support by encapsulating frustrations and directing them toward unpopular scapegoats. Up to this point, we have explored some of the motivations and circumstances that make Nyan Cat want to declare that representative government is an outmoded system that should be replaced by a system of overt priggism. However, we must look beyond both Nyan Cat's motivations and history if we are truly to understand its rejoinders. If you've read any of the shambolic slop that Nyan Cat has concocted, you'll undoubtedly recall Nyan Cat's description of its plan to take the robes of political power off the shoulders of the few honest people who wear them and put them upon the shoulders of crotchety conspiracy theorists. If you haven't read any of it, well, all you really need to know is that what we're seeing is a domino effect of events that started with Nyan Cat stating that black is white and night is day. That prevarication incited its myrmidons to paint people of different races and cultures as smarmy alien forces undermining the coherent national will. Inerudite oligarchs reacted, in turn, by I love you >.<♥I love you >.<♥I love you >.<♥I love you >.<♥ing up to adversarial, clueless meatheads. The next domino to fall, not surprisingly, was a widespread increase in voyeurism, and that's the event that galvanized me to tell everyone that courage is what we need to provide light, information, and knowledge about Nyan Cat's bitter, I love you >.<♥I love you >.<♥I love you >.<♥I love you >.<♥y precepts—not politeness, not intellectual flair, not cleverness with words, just courage. And it sometimes takes a lot of courage to look a stuck-up cheapjack in the eye and tell him that it is pointless to fret about the damage already caused by Nyan Cat's blinkered, stroppy "compromises". The past cannot be changed. We must cope with the present if we hope to affect our future and reinvigorate our collective commitment to building and maintaining a sensitive, tolerant, and humane community.

    Nyan Cat demands that its solutions be discussed in only the most positive light. To ensure that this demand is met, it sends its coalition of stultiloquent desperados and cranky flimflammers after anyone who fails to show the utmost deference when planting big, wet, sloppy kisses on Nyan Cat's behind. Almost every day, Nyan Cat outreaches itself in setting new records for arrogance, deceit, and greed. It's unquestionably breathtaking to watch it. I wouldn't judge Nyan Cat's spin doctors too harshly. They're surely just cannon fodder for Nyan Cat's plot to peddle the snake oil of abysmal, jackbooted escapism. I'm not writing this letter for your entertainment. I'm not even writing it for your education. I'm writing it for our very survival.

    The future is what we make it. More than that, these issues are actually political issues. Let's be sure that I've made myself absolutely clear: Nyan Cat frequently insists that hanging out with what I call irascible vulgarians is a wonderful, culturally enriching experience. This lie of its cannot stand the light of day, and a few minutes' reflection will suffice to show how utterly morbid a lie it is. Nonetheless, I wonder if it really believes the things it says. It knows they're not true, doesn't it? That's the question that perplexes me the most because I recommend paying close attention to the praxeological method developed by the economist Ludwig von Mises and using it as a technique to instill a sense of responsibility and maturity in those who take rights away from individuals on the basis of prejudice, myth, irrational belief, inaccurate information, and outright falsehood. The praxeological method is useful in this context because it employs praxeology, the general science of human action, to explain why some conscienceless vandals are actually considering helping Nyan Cat promote mealymouthed ideologies such as absolutism. How quickly such people forget that they were lied to, made fun of, and ridiculed by Nyan Cat on numerous occasions.

    When I say that Nyan Cat's mind games are foul, I mean it. I don't mean that they remind me of something foul or that they have one or two foul characteristics. I mean that they are foul. In fact, the most foul thing about them is the way that they prevent people from seeing that my current plan is to do something good for others. Yes, it will draw upon the most powerful fires of Hell to tear that plan asunder, but the main dissensus between me and Nyan Cat is that I profess that it is sad to see Nyan Cat infiltrate the media with the express purpose of disseminating silly information. Nyan Cat, on the other hand, contends that you and I are inferior to irritable gaberlunzies (especially the shiftless type).

    No doubt, we will need to use diverse skills and tactics if we are to kick butt and take names. But sanguinary unruly-types like Nyan Cat are not born—they are excreted. However unsavory that metaphor may be, Nyan Cat is more than crude. It's mega-crude. In fact, to understand just how crude Nyan Cat is, you first need to realize that its stories about expansionism are particularly ridden with errors and distortions, even leaving aside the concept's initial implausibility. It will be objected, to be sure, that Nyan Cat doesn't honestly want to fill our children's minds with horny and debasing superstitions. At first glance this may seem to be true, but when you think about it further you'll truly conclude that its lackeys are unified under a common goal. That goal is to enthrone falsehood in the very center of human thought. Comments on the above are welcome, but please think them out first.

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    Still not buyin it.....

  7. #7
    Osmium AngelScythe's Avatar
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    This letter is largely extemporaneous and unedited. I'm hoping that a stream-of-consciousness approach is the most honest way to convey information about how Nyan Cat's well aware that it is offended by anything that might suggest that it is a sad state of affairs when hopeless degenerates like it take credit for others' accomplishments. The nitty-gritty of what I'm about to write is this: When people say that bigotry and hate are alive and well, they're right. And Nyan Cat is to blame.

    This march into snarky scapegoatism is not happening by mere chance. It is not, as many myopic poltroons insist, the result of the natural, inevitable course of things. It is happening as a direct result of Nyan Cat's simple-minded ideals. Speaking of nefarious slanderers, if you're not part of the solution then you're part of the problem. I can't predict the future, but I do know this: It doesn't do us much good to become angry and wave our arms and shout about the evils of Nyan Cat's drug-induced ravings in general terms. If we want other people to agree with us and join forces with us, then we must raise issues, as opposed to guns or knives. You may be worried that Nyan Cat will reduce religion to a consumer item in a spiritual supermarket in the near future. If so, then I share your misgivings. But let's not worry about that now. Instead, let's discuss my observation that Nyan Cat has been trying for some time to convince people that people don't mind having their communities turned into war zones. Don't believe its hype! Nyan Cat has just been offering that line as a means to take control of a nation and I love you >.<♥I love you >.<♥I love you >.<♥I love you >.<♥ it dry.

    The poisonous wine of interventionism had been distilled long before Nyan Cat entered the scene. Nyan Cat is merely the agent decanting the poisonous fluid from its bottle into the jug that is world humanity. As I remove the veil of ignorance I have lived behind, I find that Nyan Cat keeps trying to make bigotry respectable. And if we don't remain eternally vigilant, it will undeniably succeed. No one that I speak with or correspond with is happy about this situation. Of course, I don't speak or correspond with temperamental sciolists, Nyan Cat's cronies, or anyone else who fails to realize that Nyan Cat thinks that women are crazed Pavlovian sex-dogs who will salivate at any object even remotely phallic in shape. Of course, thinking so doesn't make it so.

    Nyan Cat's cringers are often caught trying to befuddle the public and make sin seem like merely a sophisticated fashion. Of course, they deny this but we all know full well that Nyan Cat gets a lot of perks from the system. True to form, it ceaselessly moves the goalposts to prevent others from benefiting from the same perks. This suggests that Nyan Cat's inclinations may have been conceived in idealism, but they quickly degenerated into inattentive, closed-minded mysticism.

    I once tried to explain to Nyan Cat that its endeavors will undermine the individualistic underpinnings of traditional jurisprudence. Rather than feel ashamed of itself, Nyan Cat got angry at me. What this says is that my personal safety depends upon your starting to search for solutions that are more creative and constructive than the typically pestiferous ones championed by the most disorganized mental defectives you'll ever see, just as your personal safety depends upon my doing the same. That much is crystal clear. But did you know that I don't much care to share the same planet as Nyan Cat? That's why I'm telling you that if I want to contract leprosy and be forced to live out my benighted days shunned by humanity, ringing a bell, and shying away from sharps and open flames, that should be my prerogative. I don't need Nyan Cat forcing me to.

    Nyan Cat is willing to promote truth and justice when it's convenient. But when it threatens its creature comforts, Nyan Cat throws principle to the wind. Nyan Cat isn't as smart as it thinks it is. Why is that relevant to this letter? Because Nyan Cat has been telling everyone that its manuscripts provide a liberating insight into life, the universe, and everything. I would like to remind Nyan Cat that false words are not only evil in themselves, but they infect the soul with evil. Nyan Cat uses obscure words like "nondenominationalism" and "electroencephalographic" to conceal its agenda to deprive individuals of the right to call your attention to the problem of shameless heresiarchs. I find that having to process phrases with long words like those makes me feel hoodwinked, inferior, definitely frustrated, and angry. That's why I strive for utmost clarity whenever I explain to others that aside from a few exceptions, this statement is unmistakably valid. That's self-evident, and even Nyan Cat would probably agree with me on that. Even so, it insists that it has no choice but to deface property with racially and sexually derogatory epithets and offensive symbols. Its reasoning is that a book of its writings would be a good addition to the Bible. Yes, I realize that that argument makes no sense, but Nyan Cat is the type of organization that turns up its nose at people like you and me. I guess that's because we haven't the faintest notion about the things that really matter such as why it would be good for it to terrorize our youngsters.

    For many reasons, too many and too complex to go into here at this time, I must say that Nyan Cat's serfs don't want us to condemn—without hesitation, without remorse—all those who punish dissent through intimidation, public ridicule, economic exclusion, imprisonment, and most extremely, death. That'd be too much of a threat to metagrobolism, Bulverism, and all of the other garrulous things they worship. Clearly, they prefer quoting me out of context. The hour is late indeed. Fortunately, it's not yet too late to highlight all of the problems with Nyan Cat's diabolic, sneaky artifices.

    Rigid adherence to dogmatic purity will lead only to disunity while we clearly need unity to oppose Nyan Cat and all it stands for. Nyan Cat has come up with proven methods to leave helpless citizens afraid in the streets, in their jobs, and even in their homes. All you have to do is let your guard down. We are at war. Don't think we're not just because you're not stepping over dead bodies in the streets. We're at war with Nyan Cat's hostile calumnies. We're at war with its evil mottos. And we're at war with its heartless screeds. As in any war, we ought to be aware of the fact that Nyan Cat has separate, oftentimes antipodal, interests from ours. For instance, it's intererested in contaminating or cutting off our cities' water supply. In contrast, my interests—and perhaps yours as well—include telling people that Nyan Cat likes to cite poll results that "prove" that granting it complete control over our lives is as important as breathing air. Really? Have you ever been contacted by one of its pollsters? Chances are good that you never have been contacted and never will be. Otherwise, the polls would show that Nyan Cat does not appeal to most people as being the most endearing or public-minded of organizations. Maybe its image would improve somewhat if it stopped trying to support hostile governments known for human rights abuses, wrongful imprisonment, and slavery.

    I don't want to overstate this point, but my empirically validated theory is that I went puce with rage when I first heard Nyan Cat say that it's okay to leave the educational and emotional needs of our children in the uncongenial hands of bumptious foul-types. Now I could go off on that point alone, but it is unable to separate fact from fiction. That's the sort of statement that some people allege is prodigal but which I believe is merely a statement of fact. And it's a statement that needs to be made because a great many of us don't want it to ignite a maelstrom of McCarthyism. Still, we feel a prodigious pressure to smile, to be nice, and not to object to its iconoclastic beliefs.

    I reject, with immeasurable scorn and indignation, the imputation that I have any sympathies or purposes in common with incontinent present-day robber barons. That's the theory, at least. But in practice, if there's one thing that Nyan Cat is good at, it's spreading the germs of hatred, of discord and jealously, of dissolution and decomposition. I treasure discourse and debate. Am I being too harsh for writing that? Maybe I am, but that's really the only way you can push a point through to Nyan Cat. And that's what writing this sort of letter is all about. It's a way to get my message about Nyan Cat out to the world.

  8. #8
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    so what you're really trying to say is.......

  9. #9
    Quote Originally Posted by Rastan View Post
    so what you're really trying to say is.......
    Maybe she's trying to imply that Nyan-Cat suxs?

  10. #10
    Osmium AngelScythe's Avatar
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    ^he.

    damn you rastan, you don't even read them, but did you, Zeon? XD

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